pahabol happy mother’s day MAMA <3
When I am in the Philippines, I was always vocal to people how I love my Dad… on how I use to declare outloud that I am a certified daddy’s girl… my Mama never mind… ever!
I am not that close to her when I was growing up… not just like the other little girls used to be… We spent most of our childhood days with Daddy… Hindi si mama ang naghahatid sa amin sa school… hindi si Mama ang umaattend ng mga PTA meetings… Hindi si Mama ang nagpapakain sa amin ng lunch… It was always Daddy… My mom was so busy working… WORK WORK and WORK… and during weekends… CHORES day for her… busy pa den si Mama… at ako bilang panganay… right hand nya sa chores… (I am talking about those days when Mayan was still a payatot kid…) hahaha I know… baka umapila sya ai… sya na kasi yun ngayon… :) PEACE sis… ako ang TIGA- babad ng damit… tiga- saing… tiga plantsa… tiga alaga ng mga shufated… at grade three I learned to do all these… ATE ako ee… kaya ako… I can’t go out nang hindi tapos lahat ng mga house assigments ko at ni Mayan… I need to be responsible… I need to be… tough… I missed a little of my childhood… konti lang naman… >_<
I never shared secrets with Mama… di gaya ng mga friends ko noon… walang chance ee… Si Mama kasi… STRICT… hahaha… namamalo… kaya takot kami jan noon ee… kaya I never tried sharing… at isa pa… feeling ko… since kamukha ko si Daddy… ako ang napagbubutungan noon pag may tampuhan sila… theory lang naman… hahaha :’p
At this point… siguro naiisip mo… bakit naman ganun ang Mama ko? Kawawa naman ako di ba?
Things changed when I started working… wala nang work si Mama nun… ako na ang bread winner… si Mama na ang nasa bahay… lahat asikasong asikaso ako… pagkain… damit… pati nga pampaligo ko sa umaga… pineprepare nya… alarm clock ko nga den yan sa umaga… promise ang ingay nyan sa umaga… hAHAHAH… prinsesa nga daw ako… wala nga daw akong ginagawa sa bahay… siguro Mama understands how hard it is wo work for the family… sya kasi yun dati… AKO na ngayon pero mas SWERTE ako wala akong ginagawa sa bahay ee… :) hahahah!
Come to think of it… It was harder when she was working… walang nag aasikaso sa kanya… kagaya ko… in fact sya pa din… we will wake up ng may almusal na… pag dating nya from work… sya pa den magluluto… sa weekend… sya pa den… kaya naman pala mainitin ang ulo nya… PAGOD sa work… PAGOD pa sa amen… what was that little help I was boasting about kanina? wala pa sa katiting na nagawa nya for us… WALA PA.
If not because of her… Hindi ako ganito… I would not be as responsible… I would not be the ATE that my sibs have… My life would not have direction… I owe everything to her… I OWE her my LIFE.
Hindi ako vocal sa tao how I love her… I don’t metion her as much as my dad… but when I left for Canada… during my despedida… that very moment I was drunk and I broke down… I found myself hugging her… crying like a sissy girl… that moment I was ready to tell the world… that I am also afraid to be away from her… :(
Now… wala nang naghahanda ng breakfast ko… wala nang naghahanda ng pampaligo ko… wala nang nang gigising sa akin sa umaga… malayo na kasi si Mama… :(
Funny how things change… sa maniwala ka at hindi… you can ask my co workers for proof… I MISS my MOM so much… and thinking about her makes me cry most of the times… It’s hard to be away from her… harder than I thought it would be.
Lahat ng dreams ni Mama when she was young… I fulfilled… once she told me… she wanted to be writer in the school paper whe she was young… I did it for her… again… she told me she wanted to be a teacher… I am. She wanted to o abroad for a greener pasture… where am I right now? I did it for her… I did it all!
I tried to fulfill my all my mom’s dreams for herself… journalist, teacher, greener pasture… eto na Mama… nagawa ko na… :) Isa na lang…
and that is…
to be that daughter you dreamed to have…
I AM STILL TRYING… and I will NEVER STOP.
I LOVE YOU MAMA… I MISS YOU SO MUCH. You made me cry again… :) hahaha… HAPPY MOTHER’s DAY.
Pasesnya ka na sa gift ko… yan ang activity namen sa school for mother’s day… I made one for you. :) THANKS for EVERYTHING! :)
